Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Movie Review- Independence Day: Resurgence

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT???!!!

Intro

I miss the days of my youth when I was oblivious to the transparency of mediocre films. I just didn't notice how truly lacking some movies could be. I used to think that films like Saturday the 14th were scary, Howard the Duck was cool, Mannequin was romantic, Like Father Like Son was funny, and Independence Day was the greatest action extravaganza of all time. At the time that it was new, I just couldn't see any of its many faults. I loved everything about it; The characters, the suspense, the F/X filled action. But now in my later years on the road to becoming a bitter asshole, I can more easily see the bullshit in films like Independence Day and others like it. It is not a great movie. At best, it's a "made-for-TV movie" with a big budget and a few stars before or after their primes. It is still fun in some moments and has an undeniable amount of charm though, and that's what keeps it from being a total loser in my book.

Independence Day: Resurgence


The idea for the long-awaited sequel titled Independence Day: Resurgence, was inspired over a decade ago by the 9/11 attacks; So it's befitting that this film is a tragedy as well. It does however, rank down there with the other pointless sequels that have disappointed us over the years like Dumb and Dumber To, Basic Instinct 2, and Zoolander 2. The wait wasn't worth it on those and this one is no exception. Whatever the first one had going for it twenty years ago, has been reduced to a laughable failure that would even insult Michael Bay (Transformers). Think of co-writer/director Roland Emmerich (2012) as Hollywood's acceptable version of Uwe Boll (In the Name of the King). They still take him seriously because his "end of the world scenario" films still make a ton of money. But with this film, I think the man's gravy train is about to derail and crash into a canyon of resentment and failure. The entire story comes off as lazy and snicker inducing. The suspenseful build up to the alien attack in Part 1, is nonexistent this time. There's a domino effect of cinematic collapse that progressively kills this film with every passing scene. The dialogue is elementary and painful at times (especially the speeches). The story cuts into WTF?! subplots that make no sense. There's extra characters that have no business being involved and add to the story's uneven rythm. The aliens and humans both make retarded decisions that contradict their levels of technological advancement. And whatever cool visuals there are during the action scenes, have no impact because everything else around it sucks (look above). No wonder Will Smith (I Am Legend) made an over the top offer to be in this. If I had read the script, I would have done the same damn thing. This film will kill careers.

Every returning actor like Bill Pullman (Spaceballs), Jeff Goldblum (The Fly 1986), Robert Loggia (Lost Highway), Vivica Fox (Booty Call), Judd Hirsch (Taxi), and Brent Spiner (Star Trek: The Next Generation), gets used as throwaway characters and/or are so poorly written that they discredit their twenty year younger selves. Pullman plays a paranoid harbinger of upcoming doom that no one takes seriously until it's too late. Goldblum is used for his type-casted stares of surprise and lame comments. Hirsch is back for some reason, I'm just unable to figure out why (see below). Spiner is the only character that I found mildly amusing. He's somewhat funny, but he's also only as good as the people who have written him, and they are inadequate at best. The new generation of young hopefuls consisting of Liam Hemsworth (The Expendables 2), Maika Monroe (The 5th Wave), Jessie Usher (When the Game Stands Tall), Angelababy (Hitman: Agent 47), and Travis Tope (The Town That Dreaded Sundown), do nothing for the film but clog up the story with childish issues. But at least their skin's tighter. 


The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, of Independence Day: Resurgence 


The Good- The giant alien queen attack; Stupid but it looks cool.

The Bad- Do they really expect us to believe that humanity, in twenty years time with so many cities and people destroyed, has rebuilt everything and then some, with the same alien technology that they barely understood the first time around? Nope. Also, the entire subplot with Hirsch's character driving a school bus full of kids across the country, is as perplexing as it is pathetic. They should have at least sung some songs while they were torturing us.

The Ugly- The multiple pictures of Will Smith that pop up throughout the film, are hilarious! Whether it's a blatant "f u" to Smith or them just milking on his image, it made me laugh every time they showed up as a reminder to me of how god awful this whole thing is.

Final Thoughts


Independence Day: Resurgence is so bad that it becomes funny. I did however get a sore neck from constantly shaking my head in disbelief. This is what hundreds of millions of dollars are spent on now? On the bright side, it makes Part 1 seem far superior than it actually is. At least that one had Randy Quaid's (National Lampoon's Vacation) drunken charm to carry it along. This. Has. Nothing. Part 3 is planned for a go if this one's successful. We cannot let this happen! Do not spend your money on this malignant cyst of a movie. That's the real invasion. "When the studio took them into the theater, the studio abused them, sexually."
Rating- 0.5 out of 10


Independence Day: Resurgence (2016)


PG-13  |  120 min  |  Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi  |  24 June 2016 (USA)



Two decades after the first Independence Day invasion, Earth is faced with a new extra-Solar threat. But will mankind's new space defenses be enough?

Director: Roland Emmerich
Writers: Nicolas Wright (screenplay), James A. Woods (screenplay), and many more!
Stars: Liam Hemsworth, Jeff Goldblum, Bill Pullman

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