Thursday, September 15, 2016

Piece Of Shit Or Not?- Blair Witch

You can thank these three assholes for getting lost the first time

Joe's Take-

Seventeen years after the events of the Blair Witch Project (1999), the brother of one of the missing documentarians, takes a group of people into the Black Hills with an HD camera, so that they can make the same tragic choices once again and get it on video. The events are the same, the production budget is bigger, and the stick figures are breeding. There's a daddy one, a mama one, and... The only thing that stands out, is a claustrophobic scene in an underground tunnel. Otherwise there's nothing new here.

My Prediction- I loved the original film and the mythology that surrounded it. Having said that, Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000) sucked ass and today's scary movies trend to suck. I really want this to be good, but the trailers have the same old loud, quick camera panning, bullshit that we always get with these films. It sucks to say, but Blair Witch will probably be a Piece Of Shit. And if so, they can shove those stick figures where even the witch won't go.

Mike's Take -

After seeing the first Blair Witch movie, it was a highly disappointing experience. There were some good tings that came of it. First, it wasn't a full on "horror" movie, mostly it was a thriller with a kind of twist ending. Sure the first one broke ground within the genre (and, I believe for a lot of movies), using shakey cam, "lost footage" and building a good viral campaign, before it was even a thing. But, the movie wasn't that good. Now, we return to the Blair Witch mythos, which seems to return to the original idea to exploit that which we've already seen.

I'm not a fan of this type of movie, the documentary, lost footage stuff is done to death and we're not seeing anything new or interesting with this movie. I tried to talk Joe into seeing The Mechanic:Resurrection, but he told me that I was dumb and made me feel shame.
Well SHAME ON YOU JOE, because this movie WILL SUCK. Yes, it's going to be a Piece Of Shit.

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